i need positive words.
I need to tell myself positive words actually.
Terrance you are an awesome person.
You have so much talent. It’s time to showcase your talent.
You have a joyful heart and a caring spirit. Don’t let people take that for granted.
Be confident and assertive and be yourself.
I’m starting to feel like such a burden to my parents ): I understand that they are here to protect me and provide for me as best as they can and they are, but I feel like such crap because I can’t do anything to help. They just spent $700 fixing my car, finished the payments for my senior trip to Europe, and continue to put gas in my car. I’ve tried to find a job, but nothing seems to work. Places either stop hiring or just don’t want to hire me. I’m so broke. Like I literally have nothing at all.. Nothing to contribute and it sucks. It sucks because I have so many things I want to do but I just can’t right now… I feel like crap. I have a secure summer job that opens in March, but that is in March. Like that is 2 months from now.. I need something to do now.
I started attending track practice again. It’s so weird I’ve accomplished so many things with just going to track practice. So many things happened with track and my family that just kind of wrecked my confidence so to be going to that right now …. it feels awesome.. I don’t know if I am committing to it and running but I don’t know we will see. If you really want to know what happened just ask. I wrote one of my college essays on it.
I’m starting to become really lazy and hazy with school. It’s actually disappointing. I know I can reach a higher level, but I am just not pushing myself and I don’t know why. I have no motivation. Motivation just comes and goes, but I want it to stay but it isn’t. With both high school and college. Applying and choosing one is getting really stressful because I feel like I am running out of time and money. Like I won’t.. I don’t know I don’t even like talking about it right now. My friend decided to go to Cornell in like late April last year so that makes me feel better..It is between
and that is it..
I’m so ready for March… March will be good. I will have a job, and I’ll be going to Europe and it will be closer to Graduation.. I’m ready for the UPS in life. Right now I really don’t know how I feel right now. I’m a cheerful person all the time at school and in life really, but I’m just tired of being extremely happy I just want to be sad with someone. and I know who I want that someone to be, but I don’t know how they feel and I don’t think they feel the same way.. Friendships rock, but when you begin to like your friends it begins to get rocky.